Home » Humor, News » UK Guardian offers a snarky “review” of Dawkins’ latest Book

UK Guardian offers a snarky “review” of Dawkins’ latest Book

I was christened Clinton Richard Dawkins. By a strange quirk, Charles Darwin also has the initials CRD. I often think how proud he would have been to share them with me…., I propose to start this memoir with my grandfather, Clinton Evelyn, the first Dawkins to go to Balliol College, Oxford. The eulogy I wrote for his funeral still brings tears to my eyes.

I frequently pretended to know less than I actually did. This, I now see, was early evidence of my peculiar empathy towards individuals who are much stupider than me.

I shall never forget the shame I felt on my first day as a fag, after ringing the five-minute bell five minutes too late. For my many thousands of American readers, I should point out that fag in this context does not mean homosexual. Of course, some boys did make advances towards me, but I firmly believe there was nothing sexual about that. Likewise, Mr GF Bankerton-Banks whose preferred method of teaching was with his hands in a boy’s pockets. No doubt in these more suspicious times, he would have been dismissed as a paedophile.
….
I may have once, shortly after my confirmation, been foolish enough to believe in the possibility of an intelligent designer, but I have long since exposed the pathetic fallacy of that belief.

Having taken up my anointed position at Balliol, I quickly became one of the most remarkable zoologists of my generation, and it was a surprise to find my work on chickens pecking at eggshells and crickets reacting to light sources didn’t receive greater international acclaim. Not that Balliol was all work and no play. I did achieve my first sexual congress with a cellist and it was most gratifying to discover how biomechanically efficient my penis was.
….
What I hadn’t then realised was my remarkable ability to be right about absolutely everything: the consequences of that realisation will follow in a later volume.
….
Digested read, digested: Me me meme.

Appetite for Wonder
John Crace reduces the autobiography of the God-fearless evolutionary biologist to a more manageable 600 words

Recall, anti-theists rank highest among atheists in narcissism. Many people worship something or someone, and in the case of anti-theists like Dawkins, it is themselves!

NOTES
1. HT Mike Gene
2. Photo Credits Wikipedia

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7 Responses to UK Guardian offers a snarky “review” of Dawkins’ latest Book

  1. This is stuff he actually wrote?

    How embarrassing!

  2. I was christened Clinton Richard Dawkins. By a strange quirk, Charles Darwin also has the initials CRD. I often think how proud he would have been to share them with me…

    Sometimes I think if Darwin were alive today, he would recant his theory in embarrassment due to lack of evidence and many falsified predictions. I’m not so sure he would be “proud” to share his initials with Dawkins.

  3. This is not stuff Dr Dawkins actually wrote as is indicated by the last line of the quote.

    C’mon people, read the note at the bottom of the quote!!

  4. @Jerad #3 This is not stuff Dr Dawkins actually wrote as is indicated by the last line of the quote.

    The fact that it took you that long, to the very last line, to realize it’s actually a parody shows how well the article struck his main chord.

  5. tjguy asked whether it was stuff he actually wrote

    No, it isn’t.

    And no, it didn’t take me till the last line to realise that.

    But yes, it’s a funny, because apt, parody.

  6. The fact that it took you that long, to the very last line, to realize it’s actually a parody shows how well the article struck his main chord.

    It didn’t take me that long. Like any good parody it amplified certain characteristics for comic effect. I was going to reproduce some of the actual text of An Appetite For Wonder but it didn’t seem necessary.

    But, apparently, some people thought it might be what Dr Dawkins actually wrote AND they didn’t read the concluding lines.

    I was merely pointing out that it was clearly not what Dr Dawkins actually wrote. And NEWS posted it under HUMOuR!!

  7. That was funny. And, sadly, spot-on.

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